I just heard that one of the brokers, to whom we gave millions of dollars, is paying bonuses of $800,000 to some of their employees! Seems like they didn’t need that bail-out money after all. The company made a few billion dollars in the second quarter of the year. By the end of the year, maybe they can lend the U.S. Treasury a few billion. We could use it.
If they made that kind of money, in this economy, those employees must be doing a whale of a job selling something! Do you get the feeling that somebody is getting ripped off? Besides us, I mean.
Canada has been sending their trash to Michigan, and now the Governor wants to get felons from California prisons sent to Michigan. If we have to be a dumping ground, I’d rather it was watermelon or avocados than garbage and prisoners!
An older, tired looking dog wandered into my yard. I could tell from his collar and well-fed belly that he had a home and was well taken care of.
He calmly came over to me, I gave him a few pats on his head; he then followed me into my house, slowly walked down the hall, curled up in the corner and fell asleep.
An hour later, he went to the door, and I let him out.
The next day he was back, greeted me in my yard, walked inside and resumed his spot in the hall and again slept for about an hour.
This continued for several weeks. Curious, I pinned a note to his collar: “I would like to find out who the owner of this wonderful sweet dog is and ask if you are aware that almost every afternoon your dog comes to my house for a nap.”
The next day he arrived for his nap, with a different note pinned to his collar: “He lives in a home with six children, two under the age of 3—he’s trying to catch up on his sleep. Can I come with him tomorrow?”
Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.
People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to share yours.
Never lick a steak knife.
You will never find anybody who can give you a clear and compelling reason why we observe daylight savings time.
You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests that you think she’s pregnant unless you can see an actual baby emerging from her at that moment.
There comes a time when you should stop expecting other people to make a big deal about your birthday. That time is age 11.
Never be afraid to try something new. Remember that a lone amateur built the Ark. A large group of professionals built the Titanic.