Main Street by Roger Allen, publisher — November 5, 2009

Roger Allen, publisher.

Roger Allen, publisher.

Tough decision

The President is faced with many Americans wanting an end to the war in Afghanistan, but the generals wanting more troops. What’s more, the people (according to a recent survey) think the President should leave the decision to the generals.

We need to remember that if you’re a hammer, everything looks like a nail. The military is trained to wage war. They spend their careers getting ready for or fighting battles. They always want more men and equipment to do the job.

The Taliban doesn’t offer the kind of government most Americans would choose. But the war has been going on for seven years now, and trying to eradicate the moving target has claimed a high price.

The military wants to continue the effort. That’s what they do.

We the people are paying the bills and may not be so sure we’re doing the right thing. Certainly some of the Afghans don’t have much invested in politics. They may not even want democracy. Some of them consider us invaders. We Americans wonder if it’s worth maybe 50 years of expensive war and more troop deaths and maiming to change their country. The President has to decide. Whatever it is, his decision will be second-guessed. I sure don’t envy him.

Bayer’s heroin?

Why our great-grandparents were happier than we are:

A bottle of over-the-counter heroin probably helped. Between 1890 and 1910 heroin was sold as a non-addictive substitute for morphine. It was also used to treat children with coughs.

Coca Wine, anyone? Metcalf Coca Wine was one of a large variety of wines containing cocaine on the market. Everybody used to say that it would make you happy and also worked as a medicinal treatment.

Mariani Wine: Mariani wine (1875) was the most famous Coca wine of its time. Pope Leo XIII used to carry one bottle with him all the time. He awarded Angelo Mariani (the producer) with a Vatican gold medal.

C..F. Boehringer & Soehne of Mannheim, Germany, was proud of being the biggest producer in the world of consumer products containing quinine and cocaine.

Two old guys

One said to the other: “My 85th birthday was yesterday. I wanted an SUV and that’s what the wife gave me.”

The other guy responded: “Wow, that’s amazing. Imagine, an SUV! What a great gift.”

First guy: “Yup. Socks, Underwear and Viagra.”

Two women

A woman was telling her friend, “It was I who made my husband a millionaire.”

“And what was he before you married him?” the friend asked.

The woman replied, “A billionaire.”

A few last words

1. When everything is coming your way, you’re in the wrong lane.

2. Okay, so what’s the speed of dark?

3. Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays

off now.

4. Eagles may soar, but weasels don’t get sucked into jet engines.

5. How many of you believe in psycho-kinesis? Raise my hand.

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